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Within 15 minutes he finishes the bottle of wine and goes back to the bar. I’m disappointed in myself that I might have ruined her evening.

As she’s leaving two other women come up to her and ask, “Are you leaving?

I have a dentist appointment in London in the late afternoon and just before leaving home I got an email from a dating site.

It’s advertising their monthly singles evening in a pub in central London.

explains to the lay reader the science of human attachment. Authors Levine and Heller reject the traditional therapy model that discourages dependency between individuals.

Instead, they argue that dependency is natural and unavoidable:“Numerous studies show that once we become attached to someone, the two of us form one physiological unit.

Self-sufficiency and detachment increased odds of survival.

Levine and Heller observe that we are programmed to seek out emotional intelligence in the form of emotional availability when seeking a mate.

That is what I do and it seems to be the best route.I decided to push my boundaries as part of overcoming my Avoidant Personality Disorder. I won’t strike up a conversation with a single woman.Having time to kill I tell myself that it’s okay to just sit quietly in a corner and observe the shenanigans. I’ll just sit and analyse the rabbits during mating season. I get there just after the doors open at 5pm and there are three other women already there sitting chatting. I notice that she has a tongue-stud (which means cock-sucker extraordinaire). She has even lived in South Africa for a while and loves Cape Town. I’m actually not that attracted to her, good banter, but that’s all.I buy an off-peak train ticket to save money, deciding to kill time after the dentist at their ‘event’.You can not imagine how far out of my comfort zone it is to walk into a setting like that, all those single people, oestrogen and testosterone in the air, booze-fuelled antics, all sorts of crazy people, knowing full-well that I never hit it off with anybody on that dating site, all the women off it who I had taken on a date were hard London women with clear agendas involving money.

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