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Each year, one in ten teenagers reports being the victim of teen dating violence.According to the Centers for Disease Control, 23% of males and 14% of females surveys indicated that they had been part of a relationship that was violent or abusive.One winter day during my junior year, I found out that he had cheated on me again. He became enraged as I walked away to my class but he didn't follow me. In that moment, I had two choices: I could either sit there and continue to be belittled in front of everyone because he wasn't going to leave, and nobody else was going to say or do anything, or I could walk out and be shamed anyway because I had given into his threats. As we walked down the hall, he spit in my face, pulled my necklace off my neck, threw it in the trashcan and he threw me up against the lockers. Mine is a story of emotional, psychological, and physical abuse.After class had begun, I heard the door swing open, which was at the front of the classroom. He stayed at the door and looked toward the teacher and said to him in front of the whole class, "I need to speak to that fucking whore right there." He pointed at me, then he turned to me and said, "Bitch, get your fucking stupid ass out here now." Everybody turned and looked at me in shock but nobody said a word. It didn't begin immediately, in fact, there weren't any signs until we had been dating for almost a year.Violent words and actions are tools an abusive partner uses to gain and maintain power and control over their partner.Any young person can experience dating abuse or unhealthy relationship behaviors, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, socioeconomic standing, ethnicity, religion or culture.

The message must be clear that treating people in abusive ways will not be accepted, and policies must enforce this message to keep students safe.Dating abuse is a pattern of abusive behaviors -- usually a series of abusive behaviors over a course of time -- used to exert power and control over a dating partner.Every relationship is different, but the things that unhealthy and abusive relationships have in common are issues of power and control.The hell became so familiar that it was easier to stay rather than leave.It was easier to live with the shame and guilt in secrecy.




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